


Witchfit

by katwrists



Category: Devil May Cry
Genre: Death, F/M, Other, that's all for now
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-27
Updated: 2016-09-12
Packaged: 2018-04-06 10:00:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4217352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katwrists/pseuds/katwrists
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A foolish cashier, an anxious daughter, a fun-loving 50 year old witch, and two--no, three demon hunters.</p>
<p>You should've stayed in the cab.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

You stand in front of the rickety wooden house that reads: "Dee's Cauldron". Had you known THIS is where the cab was going to drop you off you might have thought twice before making a call. 

"...We are quite far from town, hopefully that won't be a problem. Knock a bit loud as my daughter doesn't have the best of hearing, she'll be the one interviewing you. I hope you decide to take the job, we will meet soon, _____!" Dee's rushed words echo in your mind. 

'..hope you decide to take the job..' Obviously you were going to take the job. You applied for it. 'I'm not exactly in the position to picky either...'

Fresh out of school you needed a job to afford the crappy apartment you had managed to snag. The little work experience you had left you desperately flipping through newspapers. You had only found this job, working as a cashier and another working at a nearby church. 

Hoping that magically you had the wrong place you check the newspaper ad once more, matching the addresses. You take a deep breath and reach to knock on the door...

More like bang.

Thinking for a moment you had overdone it you recall Dee's words. Hard of hearing or not, she had to hear that.

"Are you the fucking cops? Why would you knock like that?" The door swung open to reveal a woman, certainly not the type you were expecting to work at a place like this, but here she was, dark eyes narrowed at you, arms crossed, foot tapping,

'Guess I did over do it..'

A hybrid of an apology and excuse fall from your mouth. You try to explain that her mother told you to knock in such a manner but talking about people's mother isn't really the wisest thing to do. 

"Oh, are you _____?" Her eyes now curiously boring into your own. You nod quickly and she steps to the side. "Sweet, you're here early."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Say hi to Dante and Nero! Those sweetie pies.
> 
> Vergil's a nerd.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vergil did not want to work with this chapter!   
> NO MATTER WHAT.  
> So you know what?  
> fuck him  
> ;)

This was by far the strangest interview. Dee's daughter, which you have learned is Mars, has asked you every question an employer shouldn't. From relationship status, to sexual preference, you think it homegirl has probably asked you.  
"...this should be the last one I've had you here long enough." She says not looking up from her notepad. "Do you believe in supernatural beings?" Okay, whoa. Talk about a curve ball. Her last question was what your favorite 90's song was. 

"Well I haven't met any..." You reply. 

"That wasn't the question." The tone of her voice was so unpleasant. At first you thought she was fucking around and she may have been before but a part of you knows this is serious. Deciding to treat it as such, you think for a moment.

"No." You answer confidently. She shrugs and drops her notepad on the desk. You watch her walk to the window in the front of the room and she leans forward almost as if she was looking for someone.

"Okay, you can go if you want." You swallow the rock in your throat hoping it'll give you the courage to speak. "Or you can wait until my mom gets back and I'll drive you back." She opens the door but looks over her shoulder. "Cabs don't pick up from here, and if you walk to the city you'll be tired for work tomorrow." She winks at you and you are stuck staring at the back of her head in shock. You open your mouth to let out some noise, perferably words, but an unfamiliar male voice beats you to it.

"Mars! How you've grown!" A man with snow white hair and piercing blue eyes says to her. He's holding his arms open as if asking for a hug but all he recieves is a punch to the his gut. His red coat flows behind him dramatically as he feigns pain. She scoffs and walks back into the shop. "I haven't seen you for at least four years and that's how you say hello?" Mars looks at him for a moment and nods. 

" ______, do me a favor?" You perk up at your name since you've just been existing for the past hour and a half. "In the next room there is a box marked as 'Nero', can you bring that out for me? Thankies." 

The next room is...how can one put it politely...a fucking disaster. You are pushing past boxes and piles of garbage bags that are probably taller than this building itself, and the smell is other worldy! After a few long moments of searching that slowly became more frantic after you opened many boxes to find...things, the damn box has revealed itself to you! A sigh of relief leaves your being and you reach out to grab it...and your hand comes into contact with another beings. 

You shrill and jump backwards, forgetting your current situation. The hand you just grabbed has now grabbed you and is pulling you into it. 

And in that moment you accepted death. 

These people had decapitated heads and eyeballs in cardboard boxes like they were moving precious family photos! So whatever has you in it's grasp is clearly just as sinister. 

"Whoa, you okay?" 

You hadn't noticed you closed your eyes, so you are twice as surprised to be greeted with (once again) snow white hair and such gentle blue eyes. Scratch that, they were more hypnotic than anything. You push against his chest and stammer out an apology, he shakes his head gently but asks why you were back here. You point to the box that has now vanished in the mess that tried to claim your life. 

"Mars, why would you send anyone in that room? It's a death trap!" Nero has skillfully lead the two of you through the Murder Maze. 

"Why were you back there, huh?" She's sitting on the desk by Dante, various objects are on--is that a fucking gun?

"I don't know, it just felt like I had too." Nero admits he looks over at you. "It's a good thing I did, a tower of junk almost killed your new employee." 

"That would be two in a week, Mars." Dante adds. You look at him wide-eyed. 

"Just what do you mean by that?!" You question, although it falls on deaf ears. 

"We can talk about that later, now would you two love birds get over here?" Nero seems to catch on first. 

It is now his turn to stammer out an apology as he lets go of your hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to try and get a chapter out everyday but now that I've written it; I've probably jinxed myself, damn. See you next chapter! <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I SUCK WOW I'm trying to get over a breakup and I'm kinda of a mess but it's funny how things come back! Hahahahah sorry for the wait

In the past 20 minutes you have heard enough crazy shit to last you for about...23 lifetimes. Dante had innocently enough asked if you wanted to hear about his last job. 

'What's the big deal? If Mars seems to be so close to him he must be a good guy, right?' You think to yourself. You know Dante doesn't exactly look what one would classify as normal, but you have him the benefit of the doubt. 

Maybe he worked in construction, you didn't fucking know. 

And five minutes later you still didn't know. He's talking about Hell Gates and Devil Arms and demons. You keep looking at Mars, even Nero, expecting one of them to laugh and have Dante's story turn out to be a joke. However Nero's disinterest is very obvious, his eyes following the pen Mars had grabbed from her desk to scribble on his cast. 

"Is anyone even listening? I went through an ordeal and I need someone to talk to." You look at Dante who has his arms crossed. You nod, silently telling him you're listening but--

"You constantly wish to be in charge, yet you continually show you cannot handle it." If you were the same person you used to be when you walked into this place you probably would've done a triple take of this man. 

"Come on, bro! I know you have all that pent up frustration." He finishes his sentence with a wink. 

"Okay, as much as I love to hear you two argue we all know how they usually end." Mars says sliding between the two men. "_____, this is Vergil!" She says pointing to the only man you don't know. "He's the one we call to get stuff done." She smiles up at him although he does not engage back. 

"And what about me?" Dante asks. Nero snorts walking down the stairs. 

"Dante just tags along. It's like...buy one get one free." Nero retorts his jacket now gone. If his shirt wasn't that dark blue you could've sworn it was skin. 

'Now is not the time to gawk, ____'

"That's really funny coming from the kid wearing his sister's clothes." Dante says leaning up against a counter.

"Why can't you two come up with your own jokes?" Mars mumbles. 

"Isn't there something you need to do, Nero?" Vergil hands him a box of God (that feels wrong to say) knows what. Nero takes the box and heads back upstairs. 

"Wait! Take _____!" Both you and Nero open your mouths (probably to ask the same thing) but Mars continues to talk. "If _____ is gonna work here she needs to know what to do just in case one of you guys aren't here." 

The explanation answered your questions so you get up from your chair and make your way behind Nero. 

"AND WHEN MOM ISN'T HOME I'M IN CHARGE SO YOU CAN'T ASK QUESTIONS, NERO!" 

"SHUT UP."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay I'm satisfied with this but no promises that it will stay like this. I most likely will come back and edit it. But uh...if you wanna talk to me about Nero or Dante...or maybe even Vergil my tumblr is ivorymumble.tumblr.com you can even pester me into finishing this (at this point I'm actually begging u for that)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ya'll life been kicking my ass  
> I'm sorry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vergil finer than a mother fucker, talkin' bout "show me your motivation" and "let's have some fun"  
> B O Y   
> Also it upsets me that Nero is THIS cute and I'm just rediscovering this information?? Who let me forget?   
> I have no comments on Dante at the time

You have come to the conclusion this house is an optical illusion, because all these stairs you are walking up could not be in the house you saw about an hour or two ago. 

Or maybe it's not that many stairs, you're just trying to think of anything but Nero. 

You don't have a crush on him, or anything...but holding his hand felt pretty okay, you would so do it again given the opportunity.

"_____?" His head is peeking out of a door you walked past. You shake your thoughts (and feelings) and trudge back to join him. "Daydreaming is cool and all," he tosses the box into a...cauldron? "But keep that down there with Mars." You peer in for a second before Nero begins to pour a liquid from an iridescent glass bottle. 

"So..." You hesitantly begin. "..what are you doing?" You stare at the liquid slowly rising, it's mesmerizing and you almost have to physically move your head away. 

"I'm not exactly sure..." The young man admits. You look up just in time to catch Nero smiling to himself. Immediately redirecting your eyes to a far off bottle he continues. "Whenever I was up here I was always with Mars, and we didn't really start getting along with each other until recently." He walks back to the wall to switch bottles. "I had to come up with my own way to do this." 

After a very confusing walk through of what is expected of you. You can safely say this job is way more than you imagined and it has you just a little bit overwhelmed. 

"So what was your life like before this?" 

That's a way to take off the edge.

You reminisce on your educational career for a moment, and briefly on your social life. Nero nods and seems to take in every word.

"No way your school could've prepared you for this." There he goes, with the cutest smirk in the world. "If you have questions I'll try to answer them..." His hand comes to fiddle with his cast, the boiling of the cauldron the only sound for a moment. "Um..I'm always here to just...talk too." 

"I'd really like that."

The cauldrons contents begin to fill the room with a pinkish tint, just as Nero said. But what wasn't said was the thanks you both gave since it masked both of your blushes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What I want for you two is: You two are like the kids in class that everyone knows they have a crush on each other   
> That's my ideal, and I'm hoping future me doesn't fuck that up.   
> Another thing: more awkward Nero, it keeps me young


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry ya'll

After a nights sleep to subconsciously process your new life, you walk into Dee's confident. Mars is at her desk scribbling on that same note pad from yesterday. She smiles warmly at you. You both say your "good mornings" at the exact same time and laugh about it. 

Nero's voice echoes in your mind: treat her like a friend, she needs one

"So, what were you writing down?" You ask, still glancing around at the shelves. 

"Chapter six." You laugh for a second, then turn around confused. You open your mouth but it seems she's moved on. "So today should be fairly easy." She ruffles her hair and absently swings back and forth in her chair. "Just restocking these never ending shelves." 

You know it's not a normal life any of these people live. Nero has a sword...oh and a gun! And he's experienced with that cauldron...fiasco. Dante has these stories (he also has guns) you hope are fake but he tells them with such...passion (?) you know he's been to Hell and back. Then there's Vergil...

Enough said. 

You know you should try and bond but you aren't sure where to start. You mull over asking Mars about her childhood. That seems too cliché. You could ask about her Mom, that seems fine. Just tread lightly you guess. 

"So Mars, what's your Mom like? I've been dying to meet her." You lied but she didn't have to know that. You watch her expression alter very slightly. She appeared to be thinking and the hefty silence seemed to prove that. 

"My mother is an experienced witch." Her lips have pursed together and you patiently wait for her to continue. 

After about a moment of uncomfortable eye contact you realize she isn't.

"That's it?" You jump thinking you've voiced your thoughts. "Mars, c'mon, you know all these words and that's all you can say about Ma?" Nero walks down the stairs and gives you a little wave. He walks past her desk pushes it slightly. She sucks her teeth at him. 

"You're a nuisance." She swivels her chair to watch him walk into another room. "Our kitchen is this way come, ______." You follow behind Mars who is following in Nero's footsteps in her desk chair. 

"I'M the nuisance?" He says after looking over his shoulder. She gives him the finger. You watch his snowy locks shake slightly as he chuckles at his sister. 

You think about their relationship. They aren't biological siblings but they've been brought up like so. Not wanting to drift off you bring yourself back to reality and find the two staring at you. 

"Is everything okay?" Nero asks you, his eyebrows slightly furrowed in concern and his blue eyes boring into yours. Mars snorts. 

"Dude, you might not know that look because you don't this but....she's thinking." 

He pushes her chair down the hallway and you laugh at her giggles fading farther away. Nero stares at you again causing your laugh to slowly die. 

"Don't encourage that little..." Wow it just got really awkward. "Nerd." You two squeeze out chuckles. You can't stand here and just...exist. You have to get him to keep talking! But about what? 

"How would you describe her?" You blurt out. It was sudden but shit, it was smooth. You still seem to have caught him off guard. 

"Who? Mars?" You genuinely chuckle again. 

"No, your Mother." You correct. "You made it seem like Mars didn't do her justice." You visibly see his body relax and note his family may be something he can talk about any time.

Which is super fucking cute.

"Well...she's really understanding. As you can tell my sister and I aren't exactly the most ordinary of people..." that is a massive understatement but you'll let it slide. "...but she looks past it. She sees us as individuals that have feelings. Some more than others." He tilts his head in the general direction he pushed his sister. You smile softly at him. "All of that and she has really gentle eyes." 

Your head cocks in confusion. "What do gentle eyes look like exactly?" His snowy locks shake slightly once again.

"Have you ever looked at yourself in a mirror?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> too cheesy?

**Author's Note:**

> I am finally contributing this fandom  
> yeah YEAH  
> er...chapter two is being written right now  
> 'write now' ahaha


End file.
